Actually, if it was a snapshot you didn't get that message to me either...I thought the dad was dead and the kid was associating the lecturing cop with his dad.

About the southern thing...I'm sitting right here in the most southern state of the continental US (not in the most "southern" part,though)...it was just very slow,actually a little laborious for a short movie.It was painful.I'm sorry but I watched the whole thing and it was.

Perhaps, you should send in one of your other pieces, if they're faster

So if I had used the same script and same everything, just added more shots to make each one shorter, it would have been better?

Which shots are too long? I could perhaps see the "The way a man drives, it speaks about the man" shot. And a few others.

It just, like, okay I thought about it a few times. Like when the cop first changes position and moves from the front of the car to a right angle, facing the kid, and begins his long schpeel, I filmed it with a few different angles. I obviously chose to keep it one continuous shot. I just felt having a tighter shot, or mixing it up too much would take away from the continuity or make it overly dramatic when it was intended to be simple.

quote:

Tisch is looking for drama and concept. Yours didn't really have either.

I don't see how this is true. I love criticism, just explain yourself at such a huge comment. No concept? Father and son relationship and the father's message? Drama, watch is a second time knowing there is a father-son relationship. Maybe it's true, I just don't understand what you mean.

Anyway, more full reviews would be appreciated. I continue to thank all those helping me refine my filmmaking skills so my next project can be as best as it can.

Thanks!

Tyler

quote:

Actually, if it was a snapshot you didn't get that message to me either...I thought the dad was dead and the kid was associating the lecturing cop with his dad.

Say what? Lol.

Tyler

quote:

So if I had used the same script and same everything, just added more shots to make each one shorter, it would have been better?

No. You'd have to change the story.

Anyway, the reason I thought it was melodramatic, is that in addition to having this guy give a diatribe on the meaning of life, you also have to have him be the father as well. I think it kills the point, and tries to pretentiously overdrive (no pun intended) the point.

Visual clues will help you, along with dialouge which better reveals the two characters. Show rather than tell.

I don't know why your advisor told you not to apply to ED. The guy sounds like an educated idiot.

But that's why we make more films, we learn as time goes by that not all of us are writer/director/producer/cinemotographer/edtors, rather that we are just editors, or just directors, or just writers, or just DPs.

I look forward to your next film. Good luck.

My counselor basically said that should I apply ED and get in, I couldn't continue my apps with other schools. If I got in other schools with scholarships, because my grades are very good, I could use that to try to get NYU to give me more money. That was her reasoning. My reasoning was do whatever the hell I can to get in, then worry about the money. In the end, it was a decision between me and my parents. My parents wanted to do what the advisor said. Oh well.

Anyway, do you know the definition of diatribe? The father does not make an attack or criticsm on anything... Look pal, not liking my story is one thing, but understanding why you don't is another. The point of the whole story is not to educate anyone about the meaning of life. Rather, my story tried to show something. It tried to show how a Southern father, who happens to be a cop, communicates with his son. That's the point, and if he wasn't the father, there would be no point.

Thanks though.

Tyler

By the way, if you can read it, the ticket at the very end, after it flashes back to the "Ticket" scene, simply says "I love you." Maybe this helps reinforce the fact that I'm not trying to come across as preaching life's point, but just trying to represent a real life relationship and culture.

Tyler

I liked it, I thought it was interesting, and I liked your point of view. I understand where you are right now because I applied to Tisch, though under Early Decision, but I guess I didn't want to put up my work on here because I didn't want to get discouraged.

Now for a little criticism, with knowledge that you are making this for an admissions board, it would have been smarter to make the movie faster, because 1. they are not going to rewatch the movie 2. I doubt they are going to care much about the end when they just drudged through 5 minutes of slowness. Other than that, I really did like the angles that you used and it was very well done. We took very different approaches and I know mine is definately not flawless, but you have to realize that you are going to be scruitinized when you put work online. Overall, it was good, but slow like others have said.

Logan

This message has been edited. Last edited by: dhdrixle,

Yea, I gotcha. Thanks man.

All I hear directly from Tisch is that they want storytelling ability. Can't a slower story still demonstrate that I can tell a story? I don't know. Maybe it's technically wrong to do what I did, but if it's just preference, I don't know...

Like, I know Tisch looks for potential. If the biggest thing wrong with my film is the pace, wouldn't they just think: "We can teach him to speed it up because a lot of other things are good with it." I don't know.

Thanks a lot.

Tyler

I think I missed something. Where were the angels?

Though funny, I hope you know he means angles.

Tyler

I would like to think the admissions board knows at the very least to take a movie as a whole. To think they'd get bored and then disregard the end is slightly frightening... but you never know... :/

I really wanted to say that.

Thanks.

Tyler

The look and feel are good. I like the shot with the boy's face in the rear view mirror, it shows you think about where to put the camera. But your downfall is the story. It's not strong enough. It's nice you show the mending relationship between father and son, but it didn't show me you could write a deep, complex structured script. Not enough happens with the characters emotions. Was the father and son's relationship distant before the meeting? If so, you didn't indicate it. Is the son resenting the father? Does the father disaprove of his son's life, you just made it seem like he caught him speeding and that was all, no deeper meaning. The dialouge was very forced. All the sudden he starts talking about an elderly couple, and you start feeling as if its misplaced in the story. It doesn't really have that much effect on moving your film foward. I wish there was more dialogue between the father and son. The character of the son is to flat to understand anything he's feeling. Not enough happens. It's fairly bland. Nothing that stirs you or makes you think. The story, characters, and dialouge are just to weak. Your visuals are clean and well thought out, but that story will limit your chances. The next film you make, try to colaborate with someone who is a highly-skilled writer. Tell them the story, and let them come up with dialouge and work closely on character development, and major plot points. Your a good director, but you need to up the quality of story or your chances will shrink. Hope it helps.