"I don't really understand....it's a little confusing...explain this..." That's probably the last words I ever want to hear, but I've been here them for about a month....all the way down to shoot day. And I can't help but wonder if I'm riding a pony into hell. 1 of 9 readers understand my script (well 3 are teachers that haven't really gotten back to me on the latest version.)My mom doesn't really get it (but she says the new ending helps,) my old DP& his sister didn't understnd the old version, my new DP and my dad's friend (didn't understand the new version.)

I went through re-write hell with the original script to make it what is now and for some reason it only makes perfect sense to my bestfreind and I. Because everyone was kind of lost, I tried to get teacher (including my Ap english teacher to read it) to let me know what was confusing. My dad doesn't give yay or nay just asks me "what's going on with the crew?" My didn't get the point till i spelled it out for her...in a little talking piece at the end. I added a part that basically states the point but nobody has said anything about that either.
Nobody tells me exact what confuses them.

I guess I'm really lost on why everybody's lost because technically the story is about me. It's a little tough to write about yourself especially when the last 3 years of your life have been really messed up...I try to put things in laymen's terms but I don't want characters falling into ruts because they're real people.

**Is this confusing?(I could pitch this ,but I'll tell the story the way it happens):
Jay and Mia are driving in a car. The first words are Jay's "they think i have no life." Interestingly, Mia(her bestfriend) creates an awkward silence by saying nothing to dispute that.So, Jay takes this as a cue that Mia's is aggreing,she gets aggressive and tells her she's wrong then admits "it's true,but" and together they repeat Jay's excuse about being 'out of it' for 3 years- Jay with a 'woe is me' tone, Mia with 'poor baby, get over it' tone. Jay notices this tone and adds bitterly "so it's been just a little bit difficult to act normal and have a life just like everybody else. Mia reminds Jay that evrybody's just trying to help.
After more awkward silence and irritation bettwen the 2. Then, Jay tries to remind Mia(who finds the desination mundane) where she's coming from with all this 'angst'.
Cut to a Sunday afternnoon where Jay is just relaxing reading the encylopedia, when her mom walks in talking about a surprise, she's ignored but to Jay's suprise her father is also standing next to her. Together , the parents remind Jay that she's become socially inept, seeing where this going Jay tries to escape for the bathroom, but is ordered to stay. She wouldn't want to learning she's been set up on a date to Homecoming Dance by her parents. Not only has this been arranged behind her back, she's being forced to go and needs to pick up her corsage.
Hence,why they are in the car. After being reminded of this Mia only sees the humor of her friend's parents still trying to get her back in the game.Jay doesn't think it's the least bit funny.Hurt feelings and annoyence with all the sensitivity lead to an argument between the girls- onthway to the flowershop- that ends in Jay jumping out of(getting out before stops)the car.Before, she heads inside Jay lets Mia know that Mia is just like her parents and everybody else.
Pissed off, Mia storms into the flower shop
ready to get in get out, but an employee and the woner are having an argument. Derek, a young man who aparently does nothing right is getting chastised by his boss. meanwhile, Jay's pretty annoyed, I mean she doesn't want to be here in the first place. Finally, she gets their attention and Derek comes over to help her. Until, Derek's boss comes otu of the cooler to yell at him about something else he's screwed up. Derek's pretty passive as his pretty much eats him for breakfast, another worker looks on shocked, Jay watches annoyed.While issuses between Derek and his boss intensify, Jay has a battle in her inner monologue.
Irritated and finding this all pointless, Jay she doesn't need to listen to all these ideals people have for her any more than she needs to hear this arguing. Subsequently, Derek decides he's had quite enough his boss and tells her off.
Finally, they botth announce (for diff reasons) that they "don't need this," and leave.Jay,first; Derek,second.
Ouside away from their situations the rage is gone and they find themselves not quite sure what to do next. Leaning against a wall Jay says to Derek "sometime you've got to walks away," he says back to her "and just do your own thing." There's very little eye contact between them,but the both understand and give one another a nod. Mia's car is seen in front of them, then each person's feet turn away and they walk away in opposite directions one at a time. When, Jay leaves you can see the car just dissapearing behind her.**

I'm hoping maybe off paper, it can come alive and people can see what I see.I don't really knw what my actors think of it, I haven't heard any complaints.But, I hope that today when I start shooting, I can show everybody what the point is.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: KtoI,

It's incredibly hard just to read your post. Try some shorter, more direct sentences, as well as indents and line breaks. I'm recovering from a motorcycle accident, but that shouldn't affect my comprehension ability.

Why not post the complete script? It's surely more useful than a (long) summary.

first of all, I feel your pain. No one seems to really comprehend my script either, even though I personally think it's just about as cut-and-dry as it could be. I'm confident (mostly) that it'll come together once it's done.

I too had a hard time reading your summary. Just post the script or something. You've got quite a few typos, too, which doesnt help.

If you want to see the script, I can e-mail it to you. I'm sorry I'm on lengthy sentence autopilot after AP english & comp...now AP Lit.

If you want to get good AP scores, intelligibility is extremely important.

I did get good AP score.

Actors are always going to be a challenge, what else is there? The actors are the ones making the film...they are expressing in favor of you...they are expressing what you want them to say along with all those little things youd never expect. Its hard to get people to love something real, its hard to get people to want to have fun in something that isnt the normal fun thing to do. My advice would be to bring to film something the yare already familiar with. Write easier dialogue, just random stuff that anyone could say, once they g et used to that just slip em the more important ideas. constantly discuss what is going on, what you want, what they want. There's no right or wrong way to do this..but you cant hide behind the script! SCripts in my opinion are hard to understand no matter what, just talk abotu the idea, what you want them to say. have the acctors hear your general idea of what to say, this way itll leave them with nothing to do but say it however they can think to say it...wheras with a script actors are more afraid they arnt hitting the lines right.

Once upon a time in Lala land....hmm things have been going... I finished the shoot for the one this post was orignally made about but now I'm having extreme difficulty making a 5 minute thing for FLIFF and DelrayBeach, i want to enter mainly because they are in FL and I can actuall go to the festival.

I have an idea, I just have no idea how to execute/no script/storyboard...and it's supposed to be funny. I don't exactly know how to create humor, don't get me wrong... I'm a funny girl...my sarcastic cracks, catty shots at people and irony can make people bowl over but this topic... i don't know how to make it funny but not pathetic...uhh movie funny.. a little diff than what you can tell people to their faces...oh and this has to be done by Friday. Yay!

(there was another project that supposed to be in this one's place, but **** creek happened...so yesterday i came with my idea bt not much has happened after that.)

hey, what do you guys think of melodramatic acting- if it's on purpose...say comic relief.

Is your script written the way you typed it on your post? If so try Movie Magic Screewriter software. It makes everything so much easier and keeps it within industry standards. I understand your story but it's just layed out terribly and all clustered together. Maybe that could be your problem.
Hope this helps!

no. It's not written that way, it's in script form. But I already shot it. Well, that one...we lost a man tonight, I mean- a movie.

3 tests that I haven't studied for and I could tell things were going nowhere fast, I had to give up 2 film festivals...depressing stuff.

Ok, so once again I'm trying to make a movie in a week...i'm having trouble writing my script- because I've decided to base it around to poems. The way I'm visaulizing the project it should be pretty cool...but the subject matter is a little afterschool special like. Nonethless, I seriously have to get this done, not only it this for festivals (that are weeks away,) it's also a grade and before we go on break I want to blow everyone's mind.

I know no matter what I make it will be the best in the class, because even though I may not have 7 people to help me on it and crazy special effects I've got a story and I've learned a lot about execution on my last shoot.

So, I have from about 3 o'clock Friday afternoon to Sunday night to get all shooting done. Wish me luck.

You've got an interesting story with your first script.

Stick to it and you'll find it's easier than you thought.

the very first script...was made like 3 weeks ago.Right now, I'm wasting more time trying to comeup with a decent short...very short thing to shoot in a very short amount of time. As usual I'm fight a losing battle...I had a script, but I decided I hated it.


I've got it...this is a totally horrible idea (as I leave myself with alnost no time to edit) but I'll do one of 2 scripts...I think I'll go with the less crappy one...the one I started to write.

I'm so screwed(but let's just pretend like I'm not.)

On a less dramatic note..I'm about to undertake the first project for editing in a few days(as I'm going to edit at school)that should be interesting. Only thing is I'm afraid this is not my most creative piece or not what I want to be my most creative piece,if I don't have time to embark on any other ventures then this will be what I submit to both a film festival(because I'm addicted to them) and for a scholarship.

Maybe some music can help me out...there are many weeds to be slain.

I'm always so jealous...ok like the kid who was goning to shoot for me on the original project(but was replaced) is doing his own movie too (like 30 min long) and he's hooked up with an indie company here,he's got hype people all the flashy shiny lights. He's only a few months older than me and I always wonder what are these people doing that I'm not. Granted I didn't submit a script to a studio, but still I try I really do.

We were both having our audition at the first time, he had his at Full Sail, I had mine at my dad's flowershop...I know it stupid but it's a little disenchanting when you feel so far behind.

I hope, I pray...(and I don't believe in religion)that this movie is as muchas I tried to put into it... alot of people [on here] chewed me out when I was in the process of making it happen but I gave it my heart.

KToI-"he's got hype people all the flashy shiny lights."

Yeah, but remember, a movie's only as good as it's story. If you have a solid story, and he just has flashy lights, you are much further than he is (since you can always weed out the technical problems).

KToI-"I hope, I pray...(and I don't believe in religion)that this movie is as muchas I tried to put into it... alot of people [on here] chewed me out when I was in the process of making it happen but I gave it my heart."

Well, that's the most important thing. If you gave it your all and din't half-ass it, then people will notice that.

Keep it up.

well no, he doesn't just have flashy shiny lights...he wrote it, although turns out it different than i thought it would be. It's one of those "traveling penny" things.