Fade In
Int.–Apartment-Night

Well furnished living room, neatly arranged. In the center is a long couch; in front of which is a state of the art T.V set. To the left, we see the entrance to the kitchen and to the right, the front door and coat hanger. An electric fan, on top a commode, blows wildly.

Sound of door unlocking; enter well dressed man in business suit, overcoat and briefcase in his hand. He looks tired. He puts down his briefcase, takes off his overcoat and hangs it. As he enters the living room, he takes off his jacket and throws it onto the couch. Without stopping, he walks through the kitchen corridor where he disappears from sight in the back room.

The camera moves down to reveal a strange looking man sleeping on the couch, he is wearing a green military jacket(uniform); the usual coming home sounds(water running; doors; flushes etc) are heard in the background.

The man reenters the scene, shirt unbuttoned, loosening his tie. He walks over to the T.V. but stops and jumps backward as he notices the strange man.

He tries taking a few breaths, which have no effect.

He moves away as quietly as possible, for a man in his condition, into the kitchen where he picks up the phone.

He dials and re-dials after missing a few keys.

Man
(dialing; breathing deeply)
(ringing)....c-come on, pick up the phone...(click)h-hello? Ray?...yeah, it’s me Jonathan....f-fine and you..S’ nuttin’ I’m okay..sure(hesitantly)NNO..there’s aa(looking toward the stranger)(gulp)strange man in my apart-ment....(slightly panicky)I’m serious....you’re always busy....Easy for you to say.... I don’t like this...yeah sure, don’t worry about me.

He hangs up; leaning against the wall he takes a breath. He opens the kitchen cupboard where he gets out a wine glass; opens the fridge, notices something is wrong and looks in direction of the living room where he finds the wine bottle just at the side of the couch.

He goes to pick it up but a hand stops him.


STRANGER
(grunting; O.S)
I’M..Not..finished.

JONATHAN is slightly a jarred.

JONATHAN
Oh...ssorry.

Grumbling off-screen as the hand snatches the bottle. Gouging sounds; a hand puts back the now empty bottle.

JONATHAN attempts to pick it up but a brief growl convinces him to give up.

JONATHAN is puzzled, not sure what to do. He makes way for the liquor cabinet; pours himself a glass of scotch. A distant snorting is heard.

JONATHAN
Don’t even think about it.

He takes a swig, bites his lips, savoring his drink with
his tongue.

He turns the T.V set on. The stranger starts to whine uncontrollably.

JONATHAN
Alright, alright! Have it your way!

He turns it off. Lets out a great “oof”, shakes his head then sits in an armchair sipping his drink.

JONATHAN stares, over his glass, at the badly shaven stranger.

JONATHAN
I don’t know who you are-

He scrutinizes his uninvited guest.

JONATHAN
-or who you think you are but I-

JONATHAN notices something.

A strange liquid paste comes oozing out of the stranger’s mouth onto the couch then slowly flowing down onto the carpet.

JONATHAN can’t take it anymore. He springs up from the armchair.

JONATHAN
GET THE HELL OFF OF MY COUCH!

The stranger pays no attention, a grunt.

JONATHAN
YOU HEARD ME!

STRANGER
(mumbling)
ge..ehh..Geh….get me uh..notherr….battle

JONATHAN
What the hell did you just say?

STRANGER
(still mumbling)
Eeeh….Get..Me..anothER…Battle

JONATHAN
Whatever it is...your not getting it.

He takes a deep breath.

JONATHAN
Now out!

STRANGER
Hee,heeh,hehh...yeh Woddn’t..heh..ya woddn’t

He carries on laughing.


JONATHAN
(threatening)
I’ll throw you out! I swear!

STRANGER
Yaw want hurt a FLY!

JONATHAN runs to the stranger and attempts to rip the stranger off the couch.

The STRANGER bites JONATHAN’S hands.

JONATHAN
ARGGHHH! ****IN’COCKROACH!

JONATHAN runs for the door and yanks it open.

STRANGER

Wahhgghh!NAAOOH! DON’T GO!

JONATHAN
(stuttering)
If you’re not out in five seconds...
(brief hesitation)
...you won’t like it!

VOICE
What the hell is going on down there?

JONATHAN
(embarrassed)
N-N-NUTTIN’ ! uh..uh...unfinished business-not yours..get back in there.

We hear a door shut.

STRANGER
Heh,HEGH! SEE! I told you so.

JONATHAN can’t believe himself. He closes the door and goes back in.

As he is about to pick up the empty bottle a hand grabs his arm.


STRANGER
It’s too co-old outside ya know.

JONATHAN
(a little confused)
Cold? We’re in summer!

STRANGER
Heh,heh(wheeze)…you’re smart aintcha

The stranger grins revealing his badly kept teeth. He lets go. JONATHAN heads for the kitchen, bottle in hand.

STRANGER
I use ta bee smart too ya know.
(pathetically imitating an english accent)
I say! That’s a mighty fine meuridioon
You got there! 2000 to be exact! MARvelous!

JONATHAN looks at the wine label. Indeed, it says ”Méridian 2000”. He is impressed, but quickly shrugs it off as nothing.

STRANGER
Bring out the GE-WURST! I say! Bring it out!

JONATHAN is more confused than ever.

STRANGER
(laughing and growling)
Walk the plank, you seadogs! Walk the plank!

JONATHAN doesn’t understand, he takes a few steps backward and is stopped by a loud creak. He turns around and notices a floorboard slightly loose. The plank? He pulls it open, sure enough there is a dusty bottle of “Gewurztraminer 1939”.

STRANGER
(O.S.)
Yeah-UP! Finest kind!

JONATHAN takes out the bottle; stares at the label.

He looks over to the stranger.

The stranger stares wide-eyed at JONATHAN.

STRANGER
You-were-wrong! Whoaheeheeheehee!

He is laughing hysterically. He calms down a bit, clutching a couch arm.

STRANG
Brings back mem’ries don’t it?

JONATHAN

I...guess...

Jonathan is pensive, looking away.


STRANGER
You...married?

JONATHAN shrugs.

STRANGER
Wise of you..heh,heh..NUT-tin’ but trouble
NUT-tin’ but trouble

JONATHAN
(turning to the stranger)
You think so?

STRANGER
Absolutely!

JONATHAN tenderly holds the bottle top to bottom; both hands.

Back in the kitchen, he gently lays it on the kitchen counter. He slowly shakes his head in bewilderment. He walks back to the liquor cabinet to fill himself another glass.

STRANGER
Do ya no good..(bulge)..no good

JONATHAN looks again toward the stranger then looks away. He takes a swig. The stranger squirms a bit in his “bed”, JONATHAN turns off the electric fan. The stranger appears to have fallen asleep. He walks over to a shelf full of vinyl records. Going through them, he takes one out and puts it on the record player on top. Slow tango music begins to play.

JONATHAN paces around the room.

The stranger slowly wakes from the music.

STRANGER

That..music

JONATHAN turns his attention to the stranger, shakes his head then walks to the record player to turn it off.

STRANGER

NO!! Leave it!

JONATHAN obeys.

The stranger is lying on the couch hugging himself, listening intensely to the music.

STRANGER
(barely audible)

Ah, Yasmin...

He takes a cushion and cuddles it.

STRANGER

my baby, my jewel, my...wife

Cut to:
CU of a dark-haired woman smiling; she looks happy in a drunken sort of way.

Cut to:

Int.-Apartment-Night

JONATHAN
(forcing a smile)
You? married?
Light laugh.

STANGER
(almost crying)
SHUT UP!

JONATHAN shuts up.

STRANGER
(calming down;silent sniffing)
She was all mine...

Cut to:
Int.-Apartment-Day

We are in the same apartment. The furniture is arranged differently. The stranger is neatly dressed in his military uniform. He has a neat black mustache. He is dancing a tango with the woman we just saw before. They are both very obviously drunk.

STRANGER
(V.O.)
I had it all.

Cut to:
Int.-Apartment-Night

STRANGER
(to himself)
(sigh)
Why did you leave?

JONATHAN looks downward, ashamed.

STRANGER
(to JONATHAN; not looking)
You don’t know the half of it.

Cut to:
Int.-Apartment-Day

As the couple carries on dancing, the camera leaves them to approach a young girl, 17, staring out the window. She notices something.


Cut to:
POV from the window


A boy, a little older, walking up the street; he plays a few notes on a harmonica.

Cut to:
Int.-Apartment-Day

The girl gets up and discretely runs for the door. The dancing couple pays no attention to her departure. The camera stays with them as they dance.

Fade to black

STRANGER
(V.O.)

From there...an abyss opened

Fade to:
CU of the stranger; pull back as he speaks to reveal JONATHAN in the far frame.

STRANGER
Everything I ever owned..fell into that dark hole that separated us...taking all but me...what next?..(in czech or german)un matin au sortir de rêves agités, il se retrouva dans son lit changé en un énorme cancrelat. Puis sa tête retomba malgré lui et ses narines laissèrent faiblement passer son dernier souffle.

The music fades, so does the stranger.

JONATHAN is speechless. He tries to wake up the stranger but fails. He runs to the kitchen over to the phone. Dials a number (same as before), waits but hangs up the last minute. He is edgy. He runs for the front door but before he can touch the knob he is frozen. He leans his head against the door. In his frustration, he slams his fist; brief cry of pain. He looks back in the direction of his helpless visitor; he takes his overcoat then returns to the stranger to tuck him up. Next, he gets the bottle of Gewurztraminer from the kitchen and tucks it under the stranger’s arm.

WIDE SHOT of the room shows JONATHAN turning off all the lights so that the only lighting remaining is from the windows outside. JONATHAN retires to the back room where he disappears. From here on he reappears and disappears in silhouette holding one end of a phone under his arm(the other being the receiver). The distant sound of a siren is heard.


Fade out

The End

K a few comments. First off depending on how well the delviery is i think you have a catchphrase on your hands ("get the hell off my couch). Also liked (Nuttin but trouble, nuttin but trouble). The opening doesn't seem to have enough to draw the audience in. You'll need to make sure direct it pretty fast paced or else people will lose interest. I think teh general concept is good. I don't totally get why he needs to be in an army costume. That seems to be a little bit ametuer film (I say this cause i usually use costumes around the house for the sake of having costumes). Great job and good luck. Are you directing this?