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Please tell me what you think of the following first 8 pages of my script "The Legend Of Whispering Willows". I'm always looking to improve it. Tell me if you would want to read the other 97 pages or not. This is copyrighted and also registered with the WGWw. Thank you for your time.

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FADE IN

EXT. WHISPERING WILLOWS - EVENING -1880

We move swiftly through a WOODED area. Trees are seen in every direction until we reach....

A NATIVE AMERICAN VILLAGE

where a large group of OSAGE INDIANS are gathered for a CELEBRATION.

WARRIORS keep in step to the rhythmic SOUNDS of the DRUM as they dance-- YELPING as they sweep past it several times.

VOICES echo through the air as people gather around a small cooking fire, young and old alike enjoy Indian fry bread and corn.

A lone COYOTE wanders past the drum and dancers, and into the WOODS where we follow it to....

WILLOWS CEMETERY

A large group of people are gathered around TWO COFFINS. The REV. WILLIAM JONES- mid fifties, presides over the service.

REV. JONES
Brothers and sisters. We gather here today to pay our final respects to Hadius Wilson and his daughter Olivia. Let us pray for the Lords mercy, so they might enter his Kingdom upon judgement. In Jesus name, Amen.

The coffins are lowered into the ground. Several people try to comfort SOPHIA WILSON and her young son SANFORD.

SOPHIA
Come Sanford. Let your father and sister rest in peace.

We get a clear view of the HEADSTONES as the crowd disperses--

HADIUS AUGUSTUS WILSON - 1825-1880

OLIVIA MARIE WILSON - 1862-1880

Again, we follow the coyote through the woods and then up a dirt road to the foot of a....

RICKETY IRON GATE

which CREEKS as it blows slightly in the wind.

As the coyote looks up, we see through its eyes

WILLOWS MANOR

sitting quietly foreboding. We follow the coyote up a STONE pathway to the beautifully ornate FRONT DOOR, which is slightly open, and then inside to the....

INT. WILLOWS MANOR -NIGHT

PARLOR

where a MAN in his late twenties, dressed completely in black, stares out a window. The room is dark and gloomy except for the MOONLIGHT that reflects his image onto the window pane-- an image that isn’t quite human. We HEAR the man’s heart beating, and with a deep sigh he whispers....

MAN
Come back to me!!

CUT TO:
INT. KITCHEN -NIGHT -PRESENT DAY

SAMANTHA WILSON- twenties, petite, with long brown hair and light blue eyes, stands next to a KITCHEN COUNTER. She is dressed in black; returning from a funeral. She pours herself a glass of wine and quickly downs it, then proceeds to pour herself another. Her best friend....

RACHEL REDCLOUD- also in her twenties, is NATIVE AMERICAN, with long flowing black hair and dark eyes. She too is dressed in black.

Rachel stares at Samantha - concerned.

SAMANTHA
What?

Samantha downs that glass of wine also.

RACHEL
Look, I know you’re hurting, but if you keep on like that...I’ll be burying you next to your mother. I really don’t want to do that.

SAMANTHA
Are you my preacher or my friend?

Samantha starts to pour yet another glass, but Rachel stops her.

RACHEL
Both...if necessary.

SAMANTHA
Just don’t, okay?

Samantha pulls away from her and walks into the
LIVING ROOM

RACHEL
Don’t what?

SAMANTHA
Care! Give a ****! Pick one.

She plops herself down on a SOFA. Rachel joins her.

RACHEL
I know you’re hurting, Sami. But you can’t....

A long silence.

Rachel no more than finishes her sentence when Samantha breaks down.

SAMANTHA
It wasn’t supposed to be this way.

Rachel comforts Samantha as best as she can.

RACHEL
She’s in a better place now. No more pain. No more suffering, for either of you.

Samantha wipes the tears from her eyes and attempts to recover.

SAMANTHA
I’m sorry. I don’t mean to be a cry baby.

RACHEL
Remember when my dad died? I cried for days. You said it was all part of the process.

SAMANTHA
I know.
(then)
If you don’t mind...I just want to go to bed.

RACHEL
You want me to stay?

SAMANTHA
No. It’ll start a rumor around town about the two lesbians.

RACHEL
We could have our own reality show.

A slight smile spreads across Samantha’s face.

RACHEL
See, I knew I could get you to smile. Everything’s going to be okay.

SAMANTHA
Yeah.

RACHEL
You want company tomorrow at that lawyers office?

SAMANTHA
If you don’t mind? I think it’s at ten.

Rachel gets up.

RACHEL
I’ll be here at nine thirty. Now get some sleep.

SAMANTHA
Yeah. Sleep! I’ll try!

RACHEL
If you need me, call me.

SAMANTHA
I will. Now go.

Rachel gathers her stuff and leaves.

INT. SANDRA’S BEDROOM -NIGHT

Samantha sits on her mother’s bed. A portable OXYGEN MACHINE rests nearby.

She slowly flips through a PHOTO ALBUM with pictures of herself and her mother.

There’s one when they went to DISNEYLAND.Another is of them at VENICE BEACH walking along the BOARDWALK.

Samantha comes across a photo of her father, mother and herself as a baby.

Tears well up in her eyes as the emotion and grief become too much.

She closes the photo album, lies on her back, picks up her mother’s pillow and hugs it tight.

INT. ATTIC -NIGHT

Unopened boxes are spread about as Samantha looks through an ANTIQUE TRUNK.

Inside is a beautiful white and blue VICTORIAN DRESS wrapped in protective paper.

On top is an old black and white photograph of a MAN in his mid fifties, a YOUNG BOY of about ten and a OLDER GIRL of around eighteen standing next to him.

INSERT: PICTURE

SAMANTHA

is struck by her resemblance to the girl in the photograph. She slowly touches her face and then the girl’s face in the photograph.

On the back of the picture are three names....

INSERT: HADIUS WILSON, SANFORD WILSON AND OLIVIA WILSON

Samantha lays the picture aside and unwraps the dress. She takes it out of the trunk and puts it up next to her body, looking at herself in a nearby MIRROR. The dress is a perfect fit.
Under the dress lay an old LEATHER BOUND DIARY with the initials O.M.W.

She sits down on the floor and opens it.

INSERT: OLIVIA MARIE WILSON - 1879

She begins reading; each page grows more interesting then the last.

OLIVIA (V.O.)
Father grows more suspicious with each passing day. If he ever were to find out about him...my beloved Dakota, I do not know what he would do.

As Samantha reads on- her eyelids grow heavier with every passing page.

OLIVIA (V.O.)
Dakota’s father came by here tonight. He says my beloved is dying. Tis a cruel joke and not truth, I pray. I must go to him. I can only hope my father does not find out.

Before long, Samantha feels herself nodding off. Olivia’s words soon take over Samantha’s thoughts.

CUT TO:
INT. WILLOWS FOYER -NIGHT -1880

HADIUS WILSON- a powerful business man in his mid-fifties, along with the town SHERIFF and DEPUTY, surround Hadius’ daughter OLIVIA and the man she loves- DAKOTA, who has been placed in IRON handcuffs.

Dakota’s father, JEREDIAH, stands nearby restrained by the deputy, but not cuffed.
ELIZABETH- Dakota’s mother also stands nearby.
Dakota breaks away and lunges at Hadius.

DAKOTA
You will not take her!

Hadius backhands him- sending him crashing to the floor.

Olivia struggles to free herself from her Father’s grasp.

OLIVIA
STOP IT!! I hate you!

HADIUS
You will get over it.

ELIZABETH
You bastard!!

JEREDIAH
(holding back his anger)
How dare you strike my son.

Jerediah quickly moves toward Hadius and is stopped by the cold steel of the deputy’s DOUBLE BARREL SHOTGUN across his chest.

ELIZABETH
You cannot do this. He has done nothing wrong!

HADIUS
I can and I will.

Elizabeth rushes past the sheriff and deputy and grabs Hadius’ arm.

ELIZABETH
Why?! Why are you persecuting them? Do you not remember what it was like to be in love?

HADIUS
Love has nothing to do with this. I will not have my daughter marrying a filthy, stinking half-breed Indian.

Hadius pulls away from Elizabeth’s grasp.

ELIZABETH
(angrily)
Know this, Hadius Augustus Wilson. If anything happens to my son because of you, there will never pass a day or night that I will let you rest in peace.

HADIUS
Save your idol threats for someone who cares. I have had enough of this foolishness. Sheriff, let us be on our way.

The sheriff grabs Dakota’s arm, when a guttural GROWL stops him where he stands.

HADIUS
He is nothing more than an animal. Bring him.
Hadius coldly grabs Olivia by the hair, almost ripping it from her scalp.

OLIVIA
YOU ARE HURTING ME!!!

DAKOTA
DO NOT TOUCH HER!

The room erupts in total chaos.

A gun is pulled. Several GUNSHOTS ring out!!!

DAKOTA

collapses to the floor.

ELIZABETH (O.S.)
NO!!
 
Posts: 8 | Location: Kansas | Registered: January 11, 2005Reply With QuoteEdit or Delete MessageReport This Post
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